Nostalgia: The Good and the Ugly

By Edria Dayyinah

Have you ever experienced those random “remember when” conversations? “Remember when you tripped in the cafeteria?” ” Remember when you fought over that guy?” “Remember when we went here, did that?” Most of the time, recounting past experiences leaves us with a 50/50 feeling of happiness and sadness.

That is nostalgia – a bittersweet yearning for a moment, emotion, or place in the past. We love this feeling, many enjoy going to places that scream “vintage” and some even express nostalgia through art. However, do you know that in extreme circumstances, this normal feeling can produce unhealthy consequences?

Unknowingly, yearning for something long gone makes us stuck. Stuck in our minds and stuck in the past. 

Effects of Nostalgia on our Mental Health

• It Holds Us Back

 Picture this: When life doesn’t go in the way people want, they longingly remember how life used to be so “easy” or “having zero responsibilities”. Yes, it’s absolutely normal to feel that way, but it’s hard to initiate progress with such a mindset.

Obsessing over the past distracts us from solving the real problem and makes us hesitate to try new ways to improve our current state. It’s as if our minds are trapped in a different time zone, seemingly detached from our bodies.

• Complicated Relationships

This is when we miss the things that are now broken or lost. Be it a lost family member or a beloved ex-lover, we are always tempted to cling onto their memories for as long as we can. The utter joy they once brought us, the pictures, the stories – don’t you wish you had a time machine?

But then again, longing for someone who is no longer there can become unhealthy. Our time and energy spent on reminiscing may unintentionally push people away.

The standard that you have formed in your mind based on the person you have lost deviates you from things that truly matters – to value or see the different qualities of the person who is currently in front of you.

A relationship from three years ago may still have that special spot in your conscious mind, but you must make space for new people and adventures. 

• It Brings Us Forward

Pretty contradictory, right? Actually, our emotional state is bound to be affected by how effectively we manage it. With that said, how about making past reflection as inspiration for our future?

Reflecting on what our younger selves loved and wanted can trigger an instinct to do things that makes us happy, which will ultimately improve our psychological well-being. Nostalgia can also motivate us to pursue our dreams and make important life decisions.

This way, we can turn the tables around and lets us use those nostalgic feelings as a tool to keep us going. Wouldn’t our past and future selves be proud of us?

• It Can Calm You

Besides, we can use this feeling to cope with stress or sadness. For example, spending time at your family’s favourite holiday spot is one of the best ways to take your mind off the current sadness by indulging in wonderful memories.

In addition, watching your favourite childhood movies can provide you with a quick break from reality.

In my opinion, I still believe that nostalgia has its ugly side, but I’ll never regret the feeling of being in my hometown or watching My Little Pony on repeat. The key lies in our ability to use nostalgia objectively to progress and manage our mental health. Don’t forget, never let the past get the best of you.